英语写作的主题句和段落.pptx

Topic sentence and paragraphs/p44 段落的结构段落的结构o“人之立言，因字而成句，积句而成章，积章而成篇。”o刘勰 文心雕龙章句o一篇文章只有漂亮生动的句子还是不够的，我们还必须注意把文意所衔领的句子按照一定的规律组织起来，成为一个或者数个段落，从而使要表达的各层意思都清晰分明。只有这样构成的文章，才会给人浑然一体但又清晰有致的美感。oo一、主题句一、主题句o“揭全文之指，或在篇首，或在篇中，或在篇末。在篇首，则后必顾之；在篇末，则前必注之；在篇中，则前注之，后顾之。”这是刘熙载在艺概中讲的话，虽然说的是汉语整篇文章的写作，但同样适用于英文段落。在比较正规的英文写作(formal writing)中，往往就有这样的“揭全段之旨”的句子，它就是主题句(topic sentence)。简单一点说，主题句就是对全段主题的概括性陈述。段落中其他的句子都是对它的扩展、支持或证明。o主题句起着统摄全段的作用。在写作者一方，下笔可以力顾着眼点，做到内容醒目突出而且不跑题。而在读者一方，则可以通过主题句迅速地明确作者的主题，读起文章来比较快捷。o需要指出的是，英语文章对全文的主旨句和段落主题句的要求是非汉语文章所及的。受两种文化的影响，汉语文章在结构方面往往比英语文章更加随意，作者既可以开门见山立显要旨，也可曲径通幽委婉道来，甚至可以指桑骂槐旁敲侧击。对于主题的揭示很多情况下都采取“春秋笔法”，隐而不说。英语的文章段落则要明白得多，往往需要规矩完整的主旨句和主题句。这一点需要每一个英语作文学习者寄予相当的注意。为加强这方面的意识，我们下面看毛荣贵和Dorine S.Houston合编的中国大学生作文评改中的两个例子：oIn this world,we should think more of other people than of ourselves.By so doing,our world will be full of happiness.This,of course,is my personal view.But it is a lesson I have drawn from one of my own experience.So now,I would like to share that experience with you,my dear reader.o这是一名中国大学生的作文Applause on the Bus中的开头。在本书的中国编者看来，这样的开头自然而且不俗，符合汉语写作的习惯。然而美国编者认为：This is essentially a solid essay.The writer uses an anecdote to make a point Now we just need to give it a good,strong topic sentence using the writers own ideas to form it.她给这个开头段拟了下面的主题句：oA little girl taught me,and a busful of people,an important lesson about the importance of thinking more of other people than of ourselves.oOne day I took a very crowded bus to schoolo在另外一篇作文Part of My Childhood中，作者开头是这样写的：oIn my childhood,there were so many things that were worth calling to mind.Some made me happy,some made me excited,and some made me sad.But among them was an unforgettable thing,when I think of it,my good friend Tong Tong will occur to me.o作为汉语读者来说，首先用抒情的笔法奠定一种氛围，然后引导读者逐渐进入对于往事的回忆，这样的开头是非常自然而且感人的。但是美国编者显然不这样认为：oThis is a moving story about friends who have quarreled.It needs a good topic sentence to bring the reader into the feelings and message the writer wants to convey.o这位美国编者提供了这样的开头：oOne of the most unforgettable experience of my childhood involves my good friend Tong Tong.It happened when I was eight years old.o我们从上面两个例子可以看出，尽管有千篇一律的嫌疑，英语的写作追求的审美效果和汉语写作是大相异趣的。学习英文写作，对这样的差异要时刻牢记。o主题句的位置主题句的位置o一般说来，主题句既可以是在段落的开始，也可以处于段落的中间或者末尾。o1）主题句在段首o主题句放在句首是英语段落写作中最常见的一种方法。中国大学生作文评改的中国作者毛荣贵说：“笔者曾就美版的Readers Digest和Time两本期刊的100篇短文做过调查，发现其中仅有两篇其topic sentence较为模糊，而有68篇的topic sentence均被置于文/段首，其余30篇已经将段落的topic sentence升格为小标题。”根据这种情况，我们建议所有的英语作文初学者将段落的主题句放置于段首。下面是几个相应的例子：oJane and Karen have many things in common.To begin with,both girls have the same background.Jane was born and raised in the West,and so was Karen.Next,both girls are interested in the same kinds of subjects in school.Jane likes French,history,and English.In the same way,Karen likes Spanish,history and English.Furthermore,both girls want to be teachers.Jane plans to become an elementary school teacher.But Karen wants to be a high school teacher.As you can see,the two girls are almost like twins.oEven when we are very careful in the things we do each day,the risk of loss and injury is always with us.Starting the day with a shower,we risk slipping and falling through the glass door.Riding to work,we risk collision.While we are away from our homes,the risk of fire and burglary is greater.Going to school,our children risk being injured.We also loss through unintentional actions of our own that might injure others.Such events may occur regardless of how careful we may try to be,and they can cost us a lot of money.Rather than taking the chance of being wiped out financially,we transfer some or our risks to others,we buy insurance.oEating lunch is one of my favorite pastimes.Because lunch comes in the middle of the day,it gives me a welcome break from studying.At school,lunch means thirty minutes out of class and a chance to rest after the mornings work.While eating,I can plan what Im going to do in the afternoon.And besides offering a pleasant break in the day,lunch is always a good meal.o2）主题句在段落中间oThe officers of most doctors today are overloaded with people who are convinced that something dreadful is about to happen to them.At the first sign of pain they run to a doctor,failing to realize that pain is rarely an indication or poor health.We are becoming a nation of pill-grabbers and hypochondriacs who regard the slightest ache as a searing ordeal.Instead of attacking the most common causes of pain such as tension,worry,boredom,frustration,insufficient sleep,overeating,poor diets,smoking,or excessive drinking,too many people reach almost instinctively for the painkillers-aspirins,barbiturates,codeine,tranquilizers,sleeping pills,and dozens of other desensitizing drugs.oCalifornians and New Englanders are both American.They speak the same language and abide by the same federal laws.But they are very different in their ways of life.Mobility-both physical and psychological-has made a great impression on the culture of Californians;lack of mobility is the mark of the customs and morality of New Englanders.3）主题句在段落末尾oAt the beginning of a writing course,many students earn low grades because they are inexperienced writers.They simply dont know how to write an effective essay,and in the process of learning to do so,they make mistakes-and low grades.Such grades affect the students confidence and morale,making writing an unpleasant task associated with anxiety and failure.As a result,students are discouraged;instead of working seriously on their writing,they spend time worrying about the easiest way to earn a better grade on the next paper-usually by writing“safe”papers that are simple and correct but lacking in thought.Therefore,the assigning of traditional grades in a freshman writing course often works against the purpose of the course-to help students learn to write better.oAmericans might be embarrassed because their Japanese friends are so formal with them.Japanese might feel insulted because American acquaintances greet them casually.Still,the forms of greeting in both countries only show respect for others.It just happens that Americans and Japanese have a different way of looking at human relationships and thus have a different way showing respect.4）段落没有主题句o英文正规的文章，尤其是informative writing很少没有主题句的，没有主题句的情况一般出现在记叙文体中。但是也有作者有意隐而不说的情况。oThe bright child is patient.He can tolerate uncertainty and failure,and will keep trying until he gets an answer.When all his experiments fail,he can even admit to himself and others that for the time being he is not going to get an answer.This may annoy him,but he can wait.Very often,he does not want to be told how to do the problem or solve the puzzle he has struggled with,because he does not want to be cheated out of the chance to figure it out for himself in the future.Not so the dull child.He cannot stand uncertainty or failure.To him,an unanswered question is not a challenge or an opportunity,but a threat.If he cant find the answer quickly,it must be given to him,and quickly;and he must have answers for everything.Such are the children of whom a second-grade teacher once said,“But my children like to have questions for which there is only one answer.”They did;and by a mysterious coincidence,so did she.o(Implied topic sentence:To a bright child a puzzle or unanswered question is a challenge,whereas to a dull child it is a threat.)oFirst you must wait for a sunny day.Remember that the rays of the sun are most direct between 11 A.M.and 2 P.M.This is the time when you will tan the quickest.At the right time and on the right day,pick an open spot outdoors and lay out a large towel or beach mat.You may want to bring along several things:suntan oil,a portable radio,a book or magazine,sunglasses,a pillow.It is a good idea not to stay in the sun too long at first.Begin with a half hour,and then gradually increase the time you spend in the sun.Certain parts of your body will burn more quickly than others.These include the backs of your knees,the inside of your elbows,your shoulders,and your nose.Be sure to cover these spots with suntan oil when you first go outside.Cover them again with oil after you have been outside in the sun for a while.(Possible implied topic sentence:Taking a sunbath calls for careful planning.)o主题句的写作要注意两个基本要求：第一是要包含主导思想(the controlling idea)；第二是要做到概括和具体的统一。o在一般情况下，一个段落要求作者只表达一个意思，不同的意思要放在另外的段落中表达，否则容易枝杈横生，使人不得要领。这个意思就是主导思想。例如我们不能说：“We had a pleasant summer vacation but summer vacation always seems short.”。因为前面一个分句表述了一个事实，后面一个分句表述的是作者的一种看法。你不可能在一个段落中做到两方面都兼顾。o在具体的主题句写作中，作者还要注意把自己的思想用最切近的语言表达出来。既不能过于概括，也不能过于具体。如果过于概括，作者的写作往往会漫无目标或者以偏概全，从而造成段落因为得不到应有的充实而显得空泛无力；如果主题句过于具体，作者的思想就没有发挥的余地，极易造成对一个意思的颠倒重复，而真正的意思却不能得到充分的表达。在具体的写作中，最容易出现的现象就是主题句过于概括的现象。写主题句时要回避以下4个错误：IncompleteShould not be a questionMust not be too broadShould not contain phrases like“I think”,“In my opinion”,etc.My mother has passed along to me certain rules for getting along with others.Dont argue with parents;they will think you dont love them.Dont argue with children;they will think themselves victimized.Dont argue with spouses;they will think you are a tiresome mate.Dont argue with strangers;they will think you are not friendly.My mothers rules,in fact,can be summed up in two words:Dont argue.o Our life today depends very much on energy.In towns and in villages,on farms and in factories,machines have made life easier than it used to be.The machines use energy,and energy is needed for heating,lighting,communications,carrying goods-everything.Factories and industrial plants use a great deal of energy to make the things that we use and buy and sell（主题句）No one can avoid being influenced by advertisements.（推展句1）Much as we may pride ourselves on our good taste,we are no longer free to choose whatever we want,for advertising exerts a subtle influence on us.（推展句2）In their efforts to persuade us to buy this or that product,advertisers have made a close study of human nature and have classified all our little weakness.There are two ways in which one can own a book.The first is the property right you establish by paying for it,just as you have made it a part of yourself and the best way to make yourself a part of it is by writing in it.o请看下面的病例：I want to talk about my father.He is strict with his children,especially me.He wont let meout of the house unless Ive done all my homework.He is a tall and rather skinny man.Some people say he is good-looking.He has a nice streak of gray in his hair.He laughs a lot and enjoys life.My father is interesting.o读完这个段落，我们只能得到对于“我的父亲”的一些零乱的印象，但又都不鲜明。造成这种情况的主要原因是作者没有写好主题句。“I want to talk about my father”这个主题句过于宽泛，没有起到限定话题的作用。所以作者一会儿讲作者父亲对待我的态度；一会儿讲父亲的外貌特征，过一会儿又说到父亲的性格特征。真如同笔下穿着溜冰鞋，滑来滑去，不知所终。oo扩展句扩展句o一个段落是由主题句和扩展句共同构成的。扩展句是对主题句的延伸或证明。它们之间的关系构成一个段落好坏的关键。o扩展句和主题句之间至少要注意以下两点：第一，意义的相关性（unity）；第二，逻辑的一致性(coherence)。o所谓的意义的一致性指的是所有的扩展句都必须是主题句的延伸或者证明，它对主题句能起到支持的作用。否则，这样的扩展句就应当删除掉。在这方面，我国古人有“丸之走盘”的形象比喻（“丸之走盘，横斜圆直，不可尽知也。其必可知者，是丸之不出于盘也。”杜牧），说的就是作者的笔不管怎样恣意汪洋，但是都不能超出一个范围，这个范围就是由主题句限定的。o但是只有内容上的一致性还不足以保证能写出一个好的段落。在行文过程中作者还要注意各个句子的正确、紧凑安排，也就是要保证意义的连贯性。比如我们有B、C、D和E四个句子都可以证明A这个主题句，但是它们的位置如何安排呢？那就要根据它们之间的关系以及与主题句之间的关系来安排，并且还要有一定的过渡词来体现这种安排。只有这样，作者写来才会顺理成章，而读者读来也会如顺水行舟，没有妨碍。o实现意义的连贯一般采取两种手段：逻辑的连贯和过渡词的使用。逻辑的连贯就是依靠扩展句自身具有的逻辑关系对句子进行正确的排列所实现的连贯；过渡词的使用就是依靠过渡词表现连贯的意义。o在内容的一致性上，初学者容易犯的错误主要有：1）跑题；2）重复；3）片面；而在意义的连贯上，初学者犯的主要毛病是信笔游走，行文没有规矩，或者没有必要的过渡词。病例病例o1、跑题、跑题oThe report indicates that babies of fathers who smoke are likely to be smaller and weaker than babies of non-smoking fathers.Of course it is already well known that pregnant women who smoke can damage the health of their babies.My sister smoked twenty cigarettes a day when she was expecting her first child.Another worrying point is that smoking just before the start of the pregnancy can affect the baby later.I heard recently that certain foods harm unborn babies.o在这个例子中，主题句说的本来是父亲抽烟对于小孩子健康的影响，但是支持句讲的却是未来的母亲抽烟对孩子的影响。更可笑的是段落最后一句说的是某些食物可能对胎儿产生危害，真可谓离题千里了。o2、岔题、岔题oThe main school building contains most of the classrooms.That was our“second home”,the place where my classmates and I worked,studied,and learned for three years.Beyond that is the science building.Thats where we did all our laboratory work for chemistry and physics.On the right side of science building is a library,where there are a large collection of books and periodicals.We all enjoyed reading,and from this we got a great deal of benefits.Since our teachers were rich in knowledge and taught us very earnestly,we had always done better than students of other schools in joint examinations.o从语言上讲这是一篇不错的段落，而且前半部分的描写相当有序：分别介绍了教学大楼、实验楼和图书馆。但是段落的最后两句话却又另起炉灶，谈到了其它方面，严格说来这是不容许的。另外本段还缺少一个主题句，请同学们为之代拟。o3、重复、重复oWatching TV too much is harmful to your eyes.If you stay in front of TV for too long time your eyes might get hurt.You will be near-sighted.You cannot see clearly when you read.You even cannot see clearly a friend when you meet him in street.o在这个例子中，我们可以发现，这位同学的思绪总是要在一个地方停留一两步，然后才肯离开。第一句作为段首句是相当不错的，可是第二句却对它进行了重复，意思基本雷同。这完全是对有限空间的浪费。o4、片面、片面oOur school is an Army school,so we must obey many rules.Because of this my house is special in some ways.First,our house is very clean,have no piece of paper on the ground.Everything in my house is neat.Perhaps some other house is dirty,but if my house is dirty we would be punished and forced to clean it.o这是一年级学生的习作，其中有不少语言错误。但就内容来讲，本段的支持句只讲了一个内容，也就是We must keep our rooms clean。这是不足以证明We must obey many rules这一段首句的。o练习练习o1、首先找出主题句，然后排列各句：、首先找出主题句，然后排列各句：o1.a.Computers speed up registration by providing up-to-date information on open classes.ob.They assist instructors by marking multiple-choice tests.oc.Computers now perform many tasks on my campus.od.Computers can supply advisors with instant and complete information on requirements,career information,and personal data while they are talking to a student.oe.Computers keep records for the bookstore,library,cafeteria,and maintenance department.o2.a.My new Future camera has several features that I like.ob.It advances the film after each shot and automatically rewinds it after each roll.oc.Compared to other cameras,it is inexpensive.od.If I get too close to the subject,it alerts me with a buzzer.oe.It beams out an infrared ray that focuses for me,even in the dark.of.It is lightweight and compact.o3.a.Sometimes rapidly,sometimes slowly,they went relentlessly upward.ob.Last week the Labor Department reported,however,that the economys seventeen-year inflationary spiral had,for one month at least,finally been broken.oc.During March,inflation actually went down instead of up.od.This turned a trend of what economists call disinflation into outright deflation.oe.Since 1965,prices in the U.S.economy have been heading one way.o4.a.Moving back home with his parents would save him quite a bit.ob.He was glad that he no longer had to work full-time while going to school.oc.His income tax refund was enough to cover his expenses for the rest of the semester.od.The deans office approved his student loan,and he could cut his working hours.oe.He had finally paid off his car.of.Things were beginning to look up.o